Tuesday, 21 September 2010

Holy San, Day 2 - San Soul Breakers

Day 2 started early after a night on the lash in our luxury fishing hut. As I mentioned before, this hut is the bollox. It has drying out rooms for wet waders, full fly tying room, games room.....about everything you could imagine....like a fly fishing brothel!!

JT with a  proper San slab

Knocking out olive emergers in the 'lodge of dreams'

Still hung over from a heavy night, Richard our Polish guide took us to the 'islands pool' in our seven seater Citroeon mini-bus, all kitted out.  Driving around Poland to the River San, I have noticed that although this is a poor country it is extremely clean and people are very friendly.  Driving through the forest we have even seen the Polish lumber jacks who scare the shit out of me. They glare into my eyes through the van window and I have to put my hands over my arris, memories of 1970s classic film Deliverance starring Burt Reynolds!!....
Pulling up next to the river I realised what a place this is to fish..the scenery reminds me of Canada...even though I have not been there.  Huge valleys either side with loads of trees.....Richard the guide warned us of bears roaming in the woods and to be well aware if approached.  I fear the polish lumber jacks more than i do any bear!!

Everyone spread out on the mighty San
 We spread out across the river we approached a flat calm drifting pool.  I followed JT and the Geordie cunts Richie and John.  I gazed up the pool to see literally millions of pale waters hatching off.....were they on 'em? Oh yes they were!! I thought this was going to be easy takings until JT shouted across..these fish are no mugs and drag is a big no no.  I started to select small emerging olive paterns and covered fish taking olives waiting for fish to wallop the net...but this was not to be.  These fish were as selective and wised up as I have ever seen in any fishing I have ever done.  Watching these rising fish was something else....half an hour had gone and even JT had struggled to rise a fish to his artifical. It was time to get my head on and really get a grip of these fish.
I saw a fish at the rear of mesipping the full dun I could tell by the rise form this was a grayling and I knelt down in the water and spent a full hour trying to get this fish to take my olive.  In the end it came down to a 10x tippet with a size 21 pale watery, a drag free drfit and the lady calming sipped it down and I tigtened into my first San grayling.  What a joy!! But hard......I can't explain what it takes to catch such wised up fish....a San soul breaker.  To watch your artificial duns drfit past..these fish don;t even twitch a fin.  I now relaxed as I had caught a fish and went to fish a streamy pool for some action.  There I selected my LTD and twictched it through a streamy pool where it produced six small wild brownies....not really my style but I needed a destress from fishing those flat calm pools. 

JT and Richie waiting for the hatch
All the lads were having the same problems and Roger was also having problems getting a hard on. I decided to go solo and find some spots for myself and ventured into another flat calm pool full of specimen sized brown and graylings. These two were rising heavily but I knew they were going to be no mugs again.  After one hour i sat on the grass after using all my fly box and not getting a take and just sat deflated at the river edge, sparked up a Benson, started to look again at what was going on and selected a special fly JT had given me earlier in the day.  It was an olive emerger with three tails that hung in the water and obvious bright green ribbon with a CDC tuft sticking above the water.  I could see that these fish were taking pale watery emergers and were ignoring every dun that went past.  Three casts later and three cracking wild browns all above pound and a half mark all fighting like virgin hooked browns!!  From sheer frustration to sheer joy.....I had chosen the perfect fly after numerous flops and personally i think it was down to the colouration of the ribbing as I had used other emergers with different colours to no avail.
This river San gives you more ups and downs than a moody girlfriend....
Our guide Ricardo with his massive Polish sausage
The lads liined up where the stag crossed the river
Our guide Richard shouted us up for dinner which comprised of sausages fully barbecued on a wild camp fire. All the lads were starving and made short work of the grub on offer. After dinner the lads got back in the river and I saw one of the most insane things ever.  JT and the Geordies were lined across the a pool and a huge stag came dashing through the woods and dived into the river 50m in front of the 3 lads and swam the full width of the river back into the wilderness....we all stood there in amazement.  A memory I will never forget.
The day comes to an end on the San River
The evening for me was a failure as I was still tired from the last nights lash up. JT found a pod of 40cm grayling and battered them with his spinner in a magic hour spell.   We all headed back to the van where our guide Richard had set up a camp fire, baking local Polish potatoes. Starving again, all of the lads huddled around and scoffed the potatoes before getting into the van and making our way back to the lodge. We got back to the lodge with talk of fishing and got in the hot showers....but not all at the same time.
We all sat down for the evening meal which comprised of sausage meat burgers. Later on it turned into a full lash up in hard core Polish style.
Roger 'big bollox' Bryant
I must admit at this point that i am rooming with old leek and district chum Roger Bryant a good old friend of mine from LADFFA who as it turns out farts like i have never heard in my life.  Roger tells me that I talk in my sleep and i keep shouting sexual obscenities about John Tyzack. I am getting worried about this as I dont have these feelings in real life!!! Something else i must say is that Roger has the biggest pair of bollox I have ever seen in my life!! his ball sack hangs to just below the back of his knees when released from his y fronts!
Nice one
JT wastes no time......into a clunker on the San


  1. Professor Pointon,

    Does Roger need to go to the doctors about his penile problem?

    He'll certainly need to go after sharing a room for a week with you. I've been there...3 nights in total in the last 2 years and am still catching up on the sleep. You talk more bollox whilst asleep than you do in your waking hours.

    Most of the time you were shouting "Goo on Tyazck **** it in it's ****" and "**ck off!"

    Nice to see Roger has taken his glasses. Have you played "dualling banjos" with anyone yet?


  2. Nice to see that part of the San, the Trees have not changed colour yet. It was a site to see when I was there, all golds and reds and orange. Magnificent. But no stag!!
    Are you going t the old swimming pool! Beware of the old woman with dog who invites you to look at her wood huts!! She has a beard and boobs to her knees! Scary.

  3. Pointon, have you tried the ATM 'stuck dun' yet? Absolute killer, i'm sure it'll work on the holy san.

  4. I'm reading about your trip and getting all mumsy, shaking my head and muttering...boys. Sounds ace though.